Lessons on Burnout

And building a more sustainable business

This summer, I suffered what was probably my third or fourth burnout since running this business.

Off the back of what was the most (on paper) successful year of business, I was completely spent and whilst I managed to enjoy long sunny days with my family, taking the time to rest and recover from the intensity of those early months of the year, I had absolutely no capacity to think about work.

That lack of capacity resulted in emails going unread and jobs lost through my inability to take on simple tasks such as putting together proposals. I was also in complete denial about this burn out. Talking to friends, who would tell me they thought I was suffering burn out, I would protest and blame it on the never ending heat of the summer. And whilst I do think the drought had some part to play in the way I was feeling, due to the pressure it was putting on the growing side of the business, this was in reality an excuse I was telling myself and others to avoid facing up to reality.

The reality being that I had pushed myself too far, leaving no room for recovery and no time to reflect.

A bit of background

In case you’re new to these parts and don’t know too much of my history let me share, very briefly, how I got to be doing what I do.

For most of my life I worked in office jobs (marketing, events planner, recruitment, admin - you name it I have done it!) and it was only after the birth of my second son that I began to re-explore my creative side in earnest.

This after years and years of being deeply unhappy with what I was doing for a living and who I was spending the majority of my waking time with.

Fast forward five years to four years ago when I was finally able to take the plunge and quit all other work to solely focus on Botanical Tales, after years of running it as a side hustle (I really do dislike that term).

I had the skeleton of a business, which, with a little nurturing became my all.

And when I say all, I mean all!

Since I started Botanical Tales I have taken on literally everything myself:

• Accounts

• marketing

• \website building

• social media

• client liaison

• admin

• cleaning (the studio)

• packing

• growing

• drying and, oh wait a minute

• creating.

It has been a lot. And aside from a little bit of support here and there over the last few years in the form of a new website and a very adhoc gardener, I have done it all. And it has been exhausting

In these last four years, I have cycled between coping very well and crashing spectacularly .

There was the year I had to shut shop in November and missed all the Christmas sales because I had taken too much on.

There was the time after the release of my second book where I was literally frozen with debilitating fear and unable to promote said book because I had pushed myself too far.

And then there was this year.

The pattern returned once again, and perhaps this time even worse because I thought I had grown up and grown out of these behaviours. There as a lot of shame that came with it this time!